Woman’s Passions

You’ve become a mum recently. There is a kid in the house, and your life has changed completely… you’ve already heard that newborns, in general, want little. They just sleep and eat in breaks between sleep. However, nobody told you that if a kid wants something, he will require it. And there is no sense, or possibilities to keep him waiting. He will just be angry more and more, and then he will get all steamed up sob inconsolably for an hour.

A newborn also thirsts for entertainments
He is six days, and he, really, sleeps a lot. He is six weeks, and he already wishes to be amused with a rattle in your hands. He is six months, and you will cook breakfast, hopping with a doll on your hand, singing a song in a false baritone to stop boring crying of your madcap. You will have to wash in a bathroom and simultaneously pull a long string of a sheaf of butterflies, suspended over his bed in a children’s room every minute.

While you are not with him, he should remain interested and quiet. You will do a lot of similar nonsenses, because even the tiniest babies thirst entertainments and dialogue. This whimsical lump, hardly having opened eyes after a dream, immediately directs to entertainments greedy, but not to that dangling ball hanging over his head. He needs something unusual, even found.

Some parents could tell you frankly how they entertained their babies lying in diapers or sitting in toddlers. Possibly, some ways of kid amusement would shock you slightly. Here is a small list of similar actions:

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Light several big candles at once, so that a child would watch dancing tongues of flame like bewitched.
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Hang out pure multi-coloured linen in a room, so that a kid, lying under cords, would examine it with sincere attention.
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Sit a kid in a stool, arrange him opposite to a washing machine: let your researcher listen and look, how the drum rotates.
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Inflate multi-coloured rubber balls and hang out them around whole room; this picture will entertain a baby for some time.
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Throw some superfirm toy to a cat, so that it would play actively in front of a surprised kid.
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Put a cage with rather bright and chirping bird in front of eyes thirsting for novelty; supervision over it will deliver him a sheer pleasure for some time.
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If you are not frightened by contingencies, suggest your inquisitive one to unwind a toilet roll and be engaged in your affairs for some time.

And if anything similar does not operate any more, then the best means – a huge family and an infinite stream of visitors-friends. A live, susceptible child will feel fine, enjoying a society of adoring aunt, uncle, children. If you manage to catch a girl at the age from nine till thirteen years, you will find a completely devoted, patient, inventive inventor for your kid. Some boys are also good, but they are inclined to frighten small children and be less tender with them.

You should know and never hope that the next entertainment will suffice for a long time. If, going on walk or to a doctor, you took only one toy, that will be difficult. When leaving a house, always hold pockets chock-full with a set of surprises: balls, ringlets, coils with threads, tubules with soap bubbles … Constantly advance a kid’s boredom, differently a walk or visit will be saddened by revolt of a baby, who has not received entertainments. Such revolt, as a rule, is accompanied by loud shout.

Baby talk
Whether it is necessary to talk to a newborn? Certainly, talking to a baby is necessary, as much as possible. A kid also “talks” to you and with himself. His “remarks” will firstly have a character of crying and shouts - he just has no other way to “communicate”. Until two months you already can hear intonations in shout, and in three months a baby starts “babbling” - muttering something.

Not only men-fathers, but sometimes also experts consider that you should speak with a baby using normal human language, instead of “lisping” from first days after a birth. Such element of reasonableness is inappropriate during a period, while only emotions speak in a baby, and all entirely belongs to a mother’s first feelings, which as though repeats herself in her kid.

You can speak with your just born child on the most sophisticated themes, persistently and articulately repeat him any words - he will not understand you. Being in the world of feelings opening to him, a child will understand not sense of your speeches, but your intonation and depending on it will rejoice together with you or be frightened of you. A smile, stroking, baby talking will tell a baby much more about your true feelings, and your declaration of love and tendernesses, stated in “normal” language will tell nothing to him.

“Lisping” with a child before achievement of certain age is necessary. It is necessary for him to communicate with you, as well as it is necessary for you to communicate with him, doing this “as equals”. Infringement of emotional contact can fatally affect not only a child, but also feeling of motherhood developing in you. Your dialogue through “baby talk” makes a child a person, and you transforms into a mother.

In due course, your heart-felt dialogue, certainly, will change, get new forms. For now smile to a kid more often, speak with him the way you like, it doesn’t matter, that your speech thus will be inarticulate and remind more likely a child’s babble, than intelligent expressions of an adult person.

Crying language
Possibly, you noticed that a baby cries differently each time. How should you understand him?

When a child cries, he asks about help. Crying reasons can be numerous. What disturbs him, what does he need? First it is difficult to a young mother to understand values of shades of crying.

More often crying is a signal of inconvenience a baby feels. For example, a child shouts, when he is wet, and his skin is irritated. It is a whiny crying. It becomes stronger and weaker, but does not stop. It can be accompanied by a hiccups, as wet diapers lead to cooling. If you replace diapers, cover a baby with a blanket, he will calm down.

A baby anxiety can be caused by overheating. Then he complains, scatters handles and legs, his skin reddens, there are small pimples on it.

A kid can cry when he is cold. This crying begins with a sudden shrill shout, which gradually passes in silent long snivel, accompanied by hands and feet movement, hiccups.

Crying connected with tight swaddling begins with silent snivel, then gradually passes in protesting shout, proceeds in the form of silent crying, is accompanied by uneasy limb movements, attempts to change body position.

A child can cry for hunger, if had not enough milk at previous feeding and stomach was emptied before term of the next feeding. In such cases you can notice sudden shout or violent crying with hand stretching, face reddening.

Crying of a child during feeding can be connected with inflammatory process on a mouth mucous membrane or middle ear inflammation. In the latter case crying is especially loud and shrill, often arises at night, not connected with feeding.

Crying of a child in some minutes after feeding arises more often owing to painful sensations in a stomach, due to considerable quantity of air, which he has drained in together with milk. Unfortunately, this air then gets into intestines, causing long crying at which a child uneasily touches (rolls out) legs, creases forehead, screws up eyes. At a belly-ache there are breaks between short shrill barrackings.

Shout of a child during evacuation specifies in inflammatory process in urinatory tract. Crying during dejection arises owing to painful irritation from small crackles in anus.

Long whiny crying, especially at night, crying for no apparent reason – testifies not to some disease, but to a child’s high nervous excitability. Whining whimper, passing gradually in silent crying, testifies that a kid is boring.

Self-trust “back”
Approximately to seven-mouth age, a kid changes his behaviour unexpectedly for adults. He does not wish to go to anybody’s hands, does not wish to communicate with anybody, except mum. What happens? Why?

On the seventh month of life each normally developing child has special and at first sight strange line in behaviour. He suddenly, unexpectedly, becomes attached to one of adults, showing him obvious preference. A kid protests, if this person’s face drops out of sight, becomes capricious, if he passes by and does not pay attention to him, he cries bitterly, if he does not react to his attempts to come into contact.

As a rule, mother becomes an object of of a child’s attachment, but the nature does not give a mother a guaranteed right on such privilege. Emotional attachment can arise to everyone who behaves in mother way: to grandmother, father, nurse etc. Such communication is established with a person, who is constantly near a child.

Approximately on the eighth month of life a child starts to realise his accessory to a family and searches understanding, protection against any danger in them. Presence of “strangers” in a house reduces feeling of safety, stimulates occurrence of excitement, anxieties in a baby. During this period he endures feeling of dependence for the first time which is a necessary condition for healthy independence and independence of a person in future. Emotional dependence creates a certain “back”, or confidence “mooring”, from which he then goes in swimming full of adventures. During the same time a concept «my house» is being formed in a child, and later it will play an important role in life.

Psychologists believe that a kid’s requirement for such emotional communication with mother is the same as requirement for sensation of own confidence, security. Researches and experiments spent by scientists with definite purposes, allow to draw a conclusion that the main difference between “home” children and those who were in special establishments is that the first behave more easy in unusual conditions frightening atmosphere, feel mother’s protection already in infancy.

Children, deprived of such “back” since birth, behave inadequately, sob inconsolably, even if someone from adults takes them. All of us know destinies of children, who did not have close affinity with one, “own” person, which will always protect, calm down and caress.

Rejoice that a kid is so adhered to you, value this “thread”, protect and never break it. Thus reasonably concern that this communication will gradually start weakening due to natural reasons.